I remember my mommy telling me that anyone in American can grow up to be president.  She was right!  It just didn’t mean what I thought it meant.

I thought you needed unimpeachable moral character, a spotless record, and a gradual acquisition of public service experience.

Silly boy!

You don’t need any of that.  That whole arrest for public urination?  A strong positive.  After all, who hasn’t needed to urinate in public.  Member of communist party?  No problem.  Feisty youth, that’s all.  The restraining order saying I can’t come within 100 yards of a school?  Not an issue.  It shows an interest in our children’s future.  Porn star wife or ex-wife (or even ex-wives)?  Dude!

So as of today I’m officially throwing my hat in the ring.  Jim Bob for president.  Woo hoo!